A Royal Mess: The Drama of Mourning
The On-Going Saga of the Funeral of Queen Elizabeth
A few years ago, I developed an unusual interest in the British Royal Family. From time to time, I do a brain-dump and write blog posts about them. I’ve written several posts about them this week. Given the global interest in the Queen, I am republishing the last four installments in this saga. For the whole series of blog posts about the Royal Family, tag: royal mess. To start from the beginning, start here.
This essay was originally published on my blog on September 10th.
So, the Queen died. She was an awesome lady. Of course, she was human and made some serious errors. But we should certainly celebrate her great qualities this week.
Her son, Charles, is now King Charles III. He gave a really good speech yesterday, where he doled out the new titles and responsibilities. His wife, Camilla is Queen Consort. William is the prince of Wales, gets the million dollar empire - the Duchy of Cornwall, takes over his charities, and is basically the vice-King. Catherine is Princess of Wales and will help out with all that. And he added a note at the end that he loves Meghan and Harry (no mention of titles) and that they will continue their work overseas. In other words: Meghan and Harry are family, but will have no part of the royal world going forward.
The Queen died suddenly. Only Charles and Anne were there, because they were already in Scotland. The others had to take a plane and apparently, there was a lot of drama about who was going to be on that plane. Meghan and Harry, who happened to be in England anyway on their weird faux royal tour, told their reporter lap dog that they were both going up to Balmoral to be with the Queen and hold her hand as she died. The other royals read about that and were like ... uh no way.
First of all, everybody wasn't going. It wasn't like every random relative was going to be in the room watching her take her last breathe, while taking selfies of themselves for Insta. Kate stayed back home, because her kids were about to come home from school hearing all about it from their friends, and she really wanted to be with them when they heard the news. They actually knew their grandmother and were close with her. They will be sad. But none of the other grandkids, except for Will were going. Will is the next king, after all.
Secondly, Meghan has been giving interviews and doing podcasts all September that were filled with thinly veiled threats and meanness about her in-laws. Nobody wants her around. So, Charles had to tell Harry that he could come but not Meghan. Apparently, there was some fighting and a new announcement for social media. With all the hoopla, Harry missed the family flight to Scotland and showed up hours later, after the official announcement of her death. The others didn't make it in time either, but at least they were all inside the castle together, when the news broke. On that plane - Edward, Sophie, Andrew, and Will. Will drove the car with everyone to the castle.
The next day, Harry left on his own in the morning and went back to his wife at their house on Windsor estate. His brother is also back at his Windsor house about 5 minutes away. Nobody is apparently talking with each other.
Last week, Meghan gave an interview with The Cut, the fashion arm of New York Magazine. You really should read it. While on the surface, it's a celebrity puff piece, it's full of juicy tidbits. It paints the pictures of a narcissist hell-bent on revenge against her inlaws. The author of this article is apparently now on the unemployment rolls. Did someone make a phone call?
Harry and Meghan are trying to build their new business, which is apparently all about making money by appearing to care about others. They are building a brand based around kindness and giving, so people will pay them tens of thousands to give speeches. There's profit in appearing to be nice!
To help build this brand, she and a staff of 28 people (quite a crew!) created a series of podcasts filled with passive aggressive stuff about her in laws. Her podcasts started off getting a lot of attention, but have since dipped down on the charts to the #22 or #24 spot last time I looked. She was all set to do other public appearances and talk show chats to promote these podcasts and puff up her new brand, all of which had to be canceled.
So, in the midst of all this anti-monarchy media saturation, the Queen dies and everybody is massively sad. It's the biggest media event in ages. The love for the Queen, Charles, William and the rest of the family has never been this high before. And Meghan is there. AWKWARD!
Is Charles going to let the Toxic Twins sit next to him at the funeral? At his coronation? Does he really want Netflix cameras following him around everywhere? Does he want his personal conversations repeated by Gayle King the next day on American television? Not really.
And then there's Andrew, that old stinker. Having nothing to do, he's been walking the Queen's dogs and eating kippers at the breakfast buffet at her castles. But without the Queen, what happens to him? He wants to return to his old job. Charles won't let that happen.
One of his daughters, who are reportedly very nice people, might get a job with the new King, but Andrew is out. Rumors are that he might start selling his story to the press, but maybe he won't if his daughters have positions in the firm.
Disclaimer: Entertainment only.